Pour ceux qui sont capables de lire en anglais...:
=>The real trouble with reality is that there's no background music.
=>Going to church doesn't make you a Christian any more than standing in a garage makes you a car.
=>Everyone is entitled to be stupid, but some abuse the privilege.
=>War doesn't determine who's right. War determines who's left.
=>My god carries a hammer. Your god died nailed to a tree. Any questions?
=>Actual Headline: Typhoon Rips Through Cemetery; Hundreds Dead
=>A train station is where the train stops. A bus station is where the bus stops. On my desk, I have a work station...
=>When I die, I want to go peacefully like my Grandfather did, in his sleep -- not screaming, like the passengers in his car.
=>Expecting the world to treat you fairly because you are good is like expecting the bull not to charge because you are a vegetarian.
=>Always remember you're unique, just like everyone else.
=>Advice for the day: If you have a headache, do what it says on the aspirin bottle: Take two, and KEEP AWAY FROM CHILDREN.
=>I intend to live forever, or die trying.
=>To ensure perfect aim, shoot first and call whatever you hit the target
=>My mother never saw the irony in calling me a son-of-a-bitch.
=>I am not a vegetarian because I love animals; I am a vegetarian because I hate plants.
=>Why does Sea World have a seafood restaurant?? I'm halfway through my fish burger and I realize, Oh my God....I could be eating a slow learner.
=>War is God's way of teaching Americans about geography. -- Ambrose Bierce
=>The object of war is not to die for your country, but to make the other bastard die for his.
=>Evolutionists have proof without any certainty. Creationists have certainty without any proof.
=>Why do our noses run and our feet smell?
=>If 7-11 is open 24 hours a day, 365 days a year, why are there locks on the doors?
=>Anyone who uses the phrase "easy as taking candy from a baby" has never tried taking candy from a baby.
=>All those who believe in psychokinesis raise my hand.
=>Actual Headline: Blind woman gets new kidney from dad she hasn't seen in years
=>After 9/11, Bush made two statements: "Terrorists hate America because America is a land of freedom and opportunity." and "We intend to attack the root causes of terrorism." ..Sounds like everything is going according to plan.
=>Seen On a Church Bulletin: "Don't let worry kill you -- let the church help."
=>"They couldn't hit an elephant at this dist..." - General John Sedgwick (1813-1864), last words
=>If you get corn oil by squeezing corn, how do you get baby oil?
=>Why is it that when you transport something by car, it's called a shipment, but when you transport something by ship, it's called cargo?